Leading Through Listening
Hello everyone,
I hope your May is off to a good start! I am not enjoying all the rain we had this April, but this is what we get in the Midwest. I am glad that at least the trees will be good for the summer. Speaking of summer, remember you have about 45 more days of decent donor focus time before we hit the summer lulls. Now is a very good time to capture donor and volunteer attention with good touch work and meaningful opportunities for donors to partner with you and your vision. This month I am going to share an article written a while ago by one of our team members, Jami Coffman. Jami has worked with a number of you as an Executive Leadership Coach, and I thought this article was very timely. Her focus this month is on leaders taking time to listen, by first stopping, reflecting, listening and then acting. Let’s practice with our donors - smile. I hope you enjoy.
Sincerely,
Jamie
Steps for Leading out of Listening in daily life
Listening and reflecting are powerful tools of leadership that are often overlooked. Recently I went through a process of listening that impacted my own clarity in a meaningful way. I thought it would be helpful to share this life experience with you and how the tools of listening and reflecting applied. I had a wonderful opportunity to travel to Israel with two other JDLA Associates. When I returned, many people asked me, “Are you going to do a presentation on your trip?”
When I am asked a question multiple times or see a theme emerge, I take it as an indication that I should stop, reflect, and listen. As leaders, we need to take time to listen to ourselves, be attentive to our surroundings, and be reflective. For some that may mean quiet prayer time, walks, sharing with close advisors, etc. But no matter how it looks to us, listening is critical.
As I thought about doing a presentation, my first question was: “What would be the purpose?” Another key to listening and being attentive is not just to do something as an immediate reaction but to tie our actions to a meaningful direction. So, I then had to pose this question within myself, reflect, wait and come to direction from what I was seeing. In this case, my reason for going to Israel was highly connected to the objective of philanthropy.
To just “do” a presentation on Israel would be “nice,” but I don’t want to live life just doing good things. As leaders we need to live life purposefully in connection to our mission and vision. Using my trip to further explain philanthropy at a deeper level sparked a desire within me. Now, this could be a reason to do a presentation.
My next step was then to ask trusted others for feedback. What is their reaction to me providing a presentation of my trip to Israel connected to philanthropy? Notice that I did not ask for feedback as my first step. I took time to listen within first. But after listening within, there is also power in listening to others and being attentive to them. This is where I see if I gain confirmations or “push-backs.” Then, I listen some more. Do I feel resolute in moving forward on the idea? Or do I need to listen, wait and refine more?
In this case, I felt confirmed in moving forward. However, when I listen for direction with issues, this is not always the case. Sometimes I have to wait. As leaders, waiting can be hard. We like resolution. We like putting a “check mark” and moving forward. Waiting requires me to trust outside of myself. I don’t like the feeling of loss of control. However, I know too well that when I push something just for my own control or resolution, the results are not good. Usually, I end up having no results and really the more important indicator is that I end up feeling burned out and depleted.
So in summary, here are some steps in applying reflecting:
REFLECT & LISTEN within
BE ATTENTIVE AND WATCH for themes in interaction with other people and circumstances in daily life: Are themes or common questions arising from your donors?... Do you and your board members share about what you are observing?... What themes do you and other board members see happening in connection to your mission or vision?
ASK during a time of refection: What does this mean?... What is the purpose?... Where do I feel peace?... Where do I feel resistance?
LISTEN & WAIT for direction
CHECK-OUT for confirmation or feedback from trusted others
MOVE or WAIT more
CONTINUE to reflect & listen whether moving on an idea or waiting
